I need to tell you something. I went into Michael’s Crafts the other day and realized that it had been at least 2 months since I had last been there.
Now, this might not seem like a really big deal to you but believe me, it is.
You see, there was a time when I was there weekly. Sometimes twice a week. I was eagerly trying to come up with projects and crafts that I could show right here on the blog and many times I found myself wandering around the store just hoping a brilliant idea would strike like lightning.
To be honest, pretty often those shopping trips turned out to be not only a waste of time but also a waste of money.
And sometimes I tried to make things that I knew would be considered ‘popular’ but really weren’t even my style.
In the world of blogging and social media, it’s very easy to fall into the trap of trying to fit in. Everyone else has chevron patterns on their walls, you should have chevron patterns on your wall. Everyone else has a giant chalkboard hanging in their dining room, you should have a giant chalkboard in your dining room. Everyone else is decorating with a gray/white/yellow/turquoise color palette, you should decorate with a gray/white/yellow color palette.
I have found that my insecure middle school self often has a lot in common with my 39 year old self.
Because sometimes I’ve just wanted my home to fit in.
But something changed this year for me. Not only have I made peace with myself in so many different personal areas, like coming to terms with my Gong Show past, my spiritual gifts and learning how to make friends with my problems, but I’ve also made peace with my decorating style.
In fact, I kinda like my style. So, I decided that I would no longer create something just for the sake of creating something. Does that make sense? I only want to add things to my home that I REALLY love, even if they aren’t necessarily the latest trend.
And when I saw the Ballard Designs Wake Knot Pillow I knew I wanted to add it to my home. Only problem? The price. $45 for a small pillow just wasn’t going to cut it.
That’s how I found myself back at Michaels.
Only this time, I knew exactly what I needed to purchase and didn’t spend excessive amounts of time OR money!
I found a neutral pillow for only $12 (God bless those 50% off sales!) and some ribbon.
And armed with my glue gun and the Ballard Designs pillow pulled up on my laptop, I was ready to go.
It only took about 15 minutes and I absolutely love how it turned out!
You know, the desire to ‘fit in’ is a funny thing. Because the reality is that there really is no ‘in’ to fit into, right?
It’s all a bit of an illusion.
And the last thing we want to do here At the Picket Fence is feed into an illusion or create a false sense of reality.
So we commit to keep it real here.
That might mean we won’t always have the absolute latest trends or the most cutting edge design ideas.
But what we will always have is a whole lot of heart.
And in the end, that’s a place where everyone fits in, right? 🙂
I’m joining some of my friends again today for our ongoing Budget Decorating Series so be sure to pay them a visit!

Sharing this project here: Grace at Home
Amen, sister! It’s ALL about heart. It took me longer than 39 years to let go of that lie of needing to fit in. Now I’m free and being me! Good for you. And I really like your pillow. 🙂
Thank you so much Mimi! 🙂
Love it! What would we do without glue guns? lol
: )
LOL Peg!! I would be so lost without my glue gun! 😉
We are as individual as we are supposed to be. Meaning, every single person on the planet wants to fit in, be liked, have friends and be the perfect little “I have it all together” person. Then reality hits! Life is way to short for chasing all that nonsense. Be you. If you are not grey walls, paint yours purple if that’s you.
I believe with all my heart that by being you, sharing YOU with your readers, will be what draws and keeps people with you. Not the wanna be you but the you God made you to be.
I love this pillow design. But for me it’s in red with white ribbon! Either way, it is still a gorgeous pillow!
Be Blessed and be a Blessing, Hope
Thank you so much Hope! I truly appreciate your sweet comment and your lovely encouragement. You blessed me today!
I love your pillow so much! What a great project… but I love your wisdom even more!!! What a sage post. For 39 you really have it together! Vanessa I could be your mother (yes, I’m probably older than your mother) but I feel such a kindred spirit to you and Heather! Keep up the great work and the way you have your priorities straight!!! You are one-of-a-kind and so is your amazing style!!! xo
Well I don’t know about having it all together but I’m definitely trying to keep it real here! Yvonne I want you to know that I think of you as a mentor to me and treasure the relationship we’ve been able to cultivate over these last few years. Not only do I love and admire your home but more than that I just love and admire YOU! Thank you for being such a blessing and an encouragement to me always. xoxo
You go girl – this was on my “to do” list and you beat me to the punch! I knew it would be a good knock off and it looks fabulous! Well done!
LOL Doreen!! I didn’t dare do a Pinterest search for it because I was positive that someone else HAD to have already done it and then I wouldn’t make my own! 😉 Thanks so much for your sweet comment!
Bravo for keeping it real. Thanks for the wisdom, it struck a chord here. And I love your pillow.
Pat
Thank you Pat!
You knocked this project right out of the park!….Beautiful job…love the pillow….and what I love about you is that you are true to yourself….I love your “Vanessa” style!….
Awwww…thanks so much Shirley!! And I love your ‘Shirley’ style! 😉
Isn’t it funny to think about all the people who have no doubt tried to “fit in” to YOUR decorating style? Actually, yours is a great style to emulate, but let’s pray that each one discover her own style and learn to be content, as you have done. I am proud of you, sweet girl! You’ve developed great wisdom for one so young, and you do a good job of sharing it. God bless you!!
Thank you so much sweet friend!! Your encouragement means the world to me! <3
I stopped over at BD to take a look at their pillow because I had never seen the wake knot pillow and I have to say I like yours a WHOLE lot better. I like the neutral, sandy, beachy feel to it. Also, I know what you mean by trying to keep up with the trends. While I like a lot of the trends I just find that I do better (feel better and like my home better) when I make things that are my style vs. running myself ragged trying to keep up with the blogging Jones’. Great job and I love the changes you are making to your home. GORGEOUS!
Oh thanks so much Sheila!! So appreciate your comment! 🙂
I’ve always tried to keep our home somewhat stylish but quickly found that I wasn’t happy with many of the things that the décor magazines were showing. I finally realized our home only needed to make my husband and myself happy. No one else mattered. We decorate with just what makes us happy and comfortable. If we’re happy then everyone else who comes to our home is happy.
You are so right Betsy! Thanks so much for coming by today!
Love this pillow! Love even more your attitude, you are wise way beyond your 39 years, it took me 54 years to get where you are now. Good for you!
Thank you so much Sue!
Love the pillow…and the sentiment…you speak from the heart! That’s why I like it here…I feel like I fit in! 😉
Awww…you definitely fit in here!!! 🙂 Thanks so much!
Wow Vanessa!!! What you shared totally hit home. Obviously, you hit a chord with me because I have been thinking similarly about decorating. I admire you for being sooooo honest. Oh by the way, I love the pillow:)
Thank you so much Sandy!! Isn’t it nice to know we aren’t alone in our feelings? I so appreciate your encouragement. 🙂
Hi Vanessa I love the pillow and it fits right on your couch. I really liked that you took an already made pillow and made it your own. I could do that! I
I also wanted you to know how much I appreciated your kind words last week. I kept them close and re-read them to let them sink in. Many tears later, they eased my mind. Thank you!
Thank you so much Julie! And you have been on my heart and I’ve prayed for you often since you shared your situation with me. If nothing else, I just so firmly believe that there is great comfort in knowing that others have experienced similar hurts and that we can journey through it together! Maybe you could pray for me too?? 🙂
Already on it, sister!!
OH my goodness, I love your pillow!!! Well done
Thanks Anita! 🙂
Super post, my friend and love the pillow!
Thank you so much Kim!!
Great job on the pillow.. Great insight about being real…
Have a blessed day
Pam
Thanks for sharing your heart! I needed to hear that!
Thank you so much Laura Jo! 🙂
So glad to hear to feel this way too! I’m always feeling like my house is so blah since I don’t have white cabinets, and all neutral colors and well, the list goes on. And I find myself battling with my inner self because I really like my house. While it could use a little bit here and there, other priorities have come into play. Thanks so much for keeping it real!
Thank you Genny! 🙂
I like this so much, Vanessa. Just popping back in to thank you for joining Grace at Home and to tell you that I’m featuring you this week! 🙂
It has been so very long since I even ventured into blogland, but this morning I found myself sitting here with a cup of coffee and thought about this little picket fence and what you were up to. I have been here for a while enjoying things, and then I saw this post. You couldn’t have written my words better if I were whispering in your ear. Not only do I relate to what you said about, well, everything, but I like the fact that we have such similar tastes. I love (and will now probably attempt to copy…) that pillow. It goes with my style. (Which after a vacation from Debbie for about two decades, I have finally rediscovered and embraced with a complete sense of peace.. )
Hi Debbie!! Oh how I absolutely LOVED seeing your name pop up today!! I’m so thrilled that you are coming back from your blogging vacation 😉 and that you have found such a sense of peace in it. It’s all a journey, right?? Our blogs are always secondary to ‘living’ and making sure that we stay true to ourselves. I always say that we run the blog, the blog doesn’t run us and I think that helps to remove that pressure and replace it with peace. Welcome back sweet friend!! 🙂