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At The Picket Fence with Vanessa Hunt

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March 4, 2015

Clinging to Truth in the Pain

I went to bed with her on my mind.

I woke up with her on my mind.

I sent her a text as soon as I got out of bed to tell her that I was praying for her…praying hard. Praying that during their appointment that morning, they would hear the heartbeat.

God's truths quote atthepicketfence.com

Knowing that this type of appointment was all too familiar to them.

She texted back and told me she had been listening to a particular song over and over again. Clinging to the words. Making them her own.

She sent me the link to it and as I sat there watching the youtube video, I was overwhelmed.

As I sat and listened to the lyrics, I couldn’t keep the tears back.

I texted her and said this, “Those are perfect, beautiful truths. They are hard to grasp and hard to understand, but they are truths nonetheless.”

Truth is a strange thing.

We can know it in our heads and yet feeling it in our hearts is another matter.

And at no other time are we more aware of this duality than when we are hurting. When life feels so overwhelming and so unbearable that we simply cannot imagine a time when we weren’t in so much pain.

But God’s truths, the truths about who He is, His character, His promises…they don’t change. Even when our circumstances do.

Even when there is deep pain.

Even when there is confusion.

Even when there seems to be no answer.

Even when there is betrayal.

Even when there is unbearable grief.

There are times in our lives when we feel like we are dangling from a tree branch. The wind is whipping all around, the rain is pouring down on us, the thunder and lightning crash and we are clinging to that branch with all of our strength but we can feel our fingers slipping as we doubt that this branch can hold us. Or, more accurately, that WE can hold onto IT.

When we cling to God’s truths, it doesn’t mean that the storms just magically disappear. It simply means that we are miraculously given the strength to keep holding on in the midst of the storm.

We cling to the truth that God is…

Good

Just

Merciful

Mighty

Holy

Loving

Sovereign

Powerful

Because He is ALWAYS those things. Those truths don’t change even when our lives don’t go according to our plans.

And as we are able to embrace that duality of knowing the truth even when we aren’t feeling the truth, we reach a new level in our relationship with Him.

Oswald Chambers says this…

“Sorrow removes a great deal of a person’s shallowness, but it doesn’t always make that person better. Suffering either gives me to myself or it destroys me. You cannot find or receive yourself through success, because you lose your head over pride. And you cannot receive yourself through the monotony of your daily life, because you give in to complaining. The only way to find yourself is in the fires of sorrow. Why it should be this way is immaterial. The fact is that it is true in the Scriptures and in human experience. You can always recognize who has been through the fires of sorrow and received himself, and you know that you can go to him in your moment of trouble and find that he/she has plenty of time for you…If you will receive yourself in the fires of sorrow, God will make you nourishment for other people.” 

I recognize my friend as one who has been through the fires of sorrow and received herself. And I know that I can go to her in my moments of trouble just as she knows she can come to me in hers. Because she knows that I too have been through those fires.

You see, a funny thing happens when we go through those fires. Not only are we able to cling to the truths of God’s character and be refined by the ‘burning’ but we are able to praise Him even when…

Even when we don’t get the answer we wanted. And even when we do!

My sweet friend texted me later that day and said that while there was a heartbeat, they were told to prepare for the worst. That there was a 99% chance that this baby would not make it into this world.

And what did my friend do? She praised God even then. She praised Him that she had seen this baby on the screen. Heard the heartbeat as she and her husband clung to each other. She praised Him for how he was strengthening her marriage in this season. How He was revealing to her just how much she really needed to be relying on Him for everything. How GOOD He was to them and how very much they had to be grateful for. She praised even when she was mourning.

But she also prayed.

They had to wait a week, a horribly agonizing week, before the next ultrasound.

And Monday night I went to bed thinking of and praying for her.

And yesterday morning I woke up thinking of and praying for her.

I sent her a text to tell her I was praying. And I waited.

Mid-morning the text came through from her.

And I won’t tell you what it said. Because it isn’t MY story. It’s theirs.

But whether it is the news they wanted to receive or the news they didn’t, they know that the truth of who God is didn’t change…even when their circumstances did.

Vanessa signature

 

UPDATE!!!! 

My sweet friend and her husband are thrilled to officially announce that this baby is indeed alive and thriving and they just found out that they are going to be welcoming a precious GIRL to their family!! Thank you to all of you who prayed, encouraged and supported!! God is so good!!

26 Comments Filed Under: Devotionals

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Comments

  1. Lori Alexander says

    March 4, 2015 at 11:12 AM

    I read this with tears in my eyes! So happy for them and I pray this baby will survive and bring them much joy. I read “Streams in the Desert” and Charles Spurgeon every day and both of them write so much about suffering and this is where we grow spiritually. I raised 4 children who walk with Jesus. They all married godly spouses. I was as sick as a dog while I was raising them. They’ve said that my faith in the midst of such suffering is what drew them to Jesus. To have children who walk in Truth because of my suffering makes it all worth it. ALL things work together for those who love God and are called according to His purpose. Such a beautiful post! Blessings to this precious couple.

    Reply
  2. Vicki says

    March 4, 2015 at 11:57 AM

    I always enjoy getting your blogs through my email but was totally not expecting this. While I only know you through this website I’m in tears reading about such powerful prayer warriors. Praise God through all blessings told!!!

    Reply
  3. Beverly Cook says

    March 4, 2015 at 12:11 PM

    Just thank you. I’m in tears I am so moved by all your words and your story here. My 11 year old granddaughter is facing brain surgery soon. She already is a survivor of neuroblastoma cancer once. Your writing today is helping me–no more words to explain. Thank you. <3

    Reply
  4. Fran B. says

    March 4, 2015 at 12:21 PM

    Beautifully shared! Thank you for reminding us of this truth….God never changes! Praise God for this couple’s answer to prayer!

    Reply
  5. Sherri Houston says

    March 4, 2015 at 12:38 PM

    I rejoice with all! Thank you for sharing , caring, and posting this! Christians pray with each other and for one another and as you stated, ” God in the 1%,.” This is why I love your blog! You are keeping your faith and holding your values! God bless each of you!!!

    Reply
  6. Carla says

    March 4, 2015 at 12:40 PM

    This gave me goosebumps all over my body. Thank you for sharing this story. We serve an amazing God!!

    Reply
  7. Anne says

    March 4, 2015 at 1:19 PM

    Oh this was heartbreaking and also a blessing from the Lord! God knows our hearts so well.I lost our unborn daughter Rachel in 1987. It is still tough for me. We have five healthy children but the pain never goes away. I will be praying for your friend. I hope that lil fighter comes kicking and screaming into this world. Thank you for sharing.

    Lots of hugs to everyone, Anne

    Reply
  8. Dee says

    March 4, 2015 at 1:48 PM

    What a beautiful story! My daughter miscarried three times before she finally received a diagnosis of Graves Disease. She heard three heartbeats only to lose them soon afterwards. Her pain was unbearable. After her diagnosis she became pregnant for the fourth time and, armed with a team of doctors and prayer warriors, she and her husband gave us our first grandchild. Afterwards we were blessed with two more. We never forget the three angels that we never got to hold, but we thank God each day for the three little blessings we have.

    Reply
  9. Jane @ Cottage at the Crossroads says

    March 4, 2015 at 2:20 PM

    What a beautifully written story of the power of faith and prayer! I hope things continue to go well for the couple!

    Reply
  10. Vicki says

    March 4, 2015 at 2:42 PM

    Thank you for sharing this.

    Reply
  11. Lynn at Cottage and Creek says

    March 4, 2015 at 2:46 PM

    Before I reached the bottom of your post, I paused and with weeping, prayed for your friends. And then I read to the end … but it’s not the end … just a beautiful, grace-filled beginning! What a beautiful testimony! I’ve had and still have great pain in my life. Everyone says I’m strong – so strong! But I feel weak. And so I cling to His hand. Always beating myself up and questioning and hoping and doubting … but He is faithful. And His arms are always open. And He is ABLE. As He proved Himself to your friend. And to me over and over again. Thank you for sharing this. It really bless me today.
    Lynn

    Reply
  12. Sandi says

    March 4, 2015 at 4:03 PM

    Such truth in this post. God calmed my anxious heart this past week when hubby passed out at work and was in the hospital. Usually I fall apart when these unknowns happen, but as I was driving to the hospital I had a very real sense of God’s peace that no matter what happened everything would be okay…why? Because God is God and He loves us in each and every time of our lives be it good or bad.

    I pray for your friend and their precious baby. God walks right along beside them and holds them in His hands.
    Blessings~

    Reply
  13. Anne says

    March 4, 2015 at 4:32 PM

    I have goosebumps reading this!Beautiful words so eloquently spoken.

    Reply
  14. Shirley@Housepitality Designs says

    March 4, 2015 at 4:43 PM

    My thoughts and prayers are with your friends….My friend who had always gone through so many trials and tribulations….once said to me, that God does not give you anything you cannot handle…and she handled it all, right up to her death…I grieved terribly for so long, but now I am at peace as i know she was ready to be in HIs arms, as she had experienced before.

    Reply
  15. Teri says

    March 4, 2015 at 4:58 PM

    When is she due? Please keep us up on this!

    Reply
  16. Debby Messner says

    March 4, 2015 at 5:30 PM

    Praying for your friend. My daughter lost her second baby the same way. No heartbeat then she had to take the pills for a miscarriage. She ended up having an emergency D and C. She had a little by a couple years later.
    It has to be hard to see your baby and then no sign of life. I pray that this will be the time the baby will survive.
    And about the percentages…….they are only numbers. Anyone could be that 1 percent. Thanks for sharing so others can pray for her as well.

    Reply
  17. Jenna says

    March 4, 2015 at 7:01 PM

    Such happy news and tears!!! Very well written, Vanessa.

    I want to share a story and a happy warning for your friend.

    Being an only child, I wanted a big family. I’ve been pregnant six times, three miscarriages and two ectopic pregnancies that ended our child bearing. In the middle of all that heart break and loss, there was an embryo that was too small with no heartbeat. The complications started, more ultrasounds, and all I got was “nope, not viable”. In that last appointment where they told me they had to “clean up” my insides, the most unbelievable comfort washed over me. On a day filled with disappointment, I became a Christian.

    So there I am a week later, in the hospital doing the pre-op routine an hour before my scheduled D&C, and they take one last ultrasound. There it was. Her perfect little heart was flashing on the screen so fast. She is 19 now.

    I do have a warning for your friend. If this little go-getter turns out to be the one, be prepared for this kid to own her feelings! You are so scared you’re going to lose them, before and after birth, that awful scenarios fill your head, a lot. Like, still to this day. Pray. It’s just the devil playing on previous loss. God knows us and our needs, He is in control, and He is good!

    If she needs a support buddy, I’m here! We are cheering for them:) Please keep us updated and tell her there are more prayers headed her way!

    Reply
  18. Paige.Rose says

    March 4, 2015 at 11:35 PM

    First, I love the blog , second you guys are amazing!! I read this & it’s simply amazing..faith & prayer that is! Believing is seeing sometimes & this post proves that. Thanks for sharing this touching post . Happy & healthy thoughts to momma & baby for a safe/happy delivery !

    Paige.Rose

    From
    http://www.TheQuaintSanctuary.blogspot.com

    Reply
  19. bridget says

    March 5, 2015 at 6:10 AM

    I had got a message from my daugther of how much she thanks God for giving her me as a mom. I told her she was my angel and that no time or money mattered more than getting to go see her.
    I was just praying and crying this morning thinking about my children. My daughter here thats alive and my son gone on to be with Jesus.
    I was thinking my daughter is truly an angel from heaven and how I know I would have already drowned in this heartache and agony I face daily for two years facing my sons death.
    You see he had muscular dystrophy, they said he would not walk or live long. He walked until he was in his 20s. He lived to be 34. The doctors were amazed he wasnt in a wheelchair at a younger age. He was such a loving child and everyone was his friend.

    Then I get up and read all this and it encouraged me so much. I know God let me see this for a reason. Thanks for your words of hope. God doesn’t make mistakes and he has the last word in every situation. I will be praying. They only know about the 1% but God has the 99% in his hands.

    Reply
  20. Sherry says

    March 5, 2015 at 8:32 AM

    Thank you for sharing these powerful words that were so needed today. Jesus left the 99 and sought the one, this child is a blessing, so happy for them.

    Reply
  21. Brenda Scott says

    March 5, 2015 at 6:28 PM

    That was so beautiful, and a wonderful reminder of God’s faithfulness.
    Thank you for sharing!

    Reply
  22. Maria Gonzalez says

    March 5, 2015 at 7:03 PM

    Cried reading this. Everyones circumstances are different but our God never changes and I am grateful for His Love. Thank you for sharing this; I am so encouraged.

    Reply
    • At The Picket Fence says

      March 5, 2015 at 8:33 PM

      Thank you so much Maria! 🙂

      Reply
  23. Shannon @ Fox Hollow Cottage says

    March 5, 2015 at 8:36 PM

    I’ve been the one texting and praying, I hope all continues well!!!!

    Reply
  24. Betty says

    March 13, 2015 at 5:38 AM

    Bridget, I can certainly identify with your sorrow because we lost our son much too early. I wasn’t able to give birth, but God in his great mercy, allowed us to adopt a son and a daughter. He lived to be 24, and our daughter is now 44 and such a blessing! We also have 5 grandchildren. God is soooooo good and we are most grateful. Betty

    Reply
  25. Katy | Her Cup of Joy says

    April 1, 2015 at 7:31 AM

    Wow this is so beautifully written! yes we must praise Him at all times! Trust in Him with all of our heart!

    Reply

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I’m never.going.back to stressful, time-consumin I’m never.going.back to stressful, time-consuming seasonal decorating. When I think back on the years where I would feel all of the pressure to come up with something fresh and creative I’m seriously embarrassed. Truly. Because it was such a waste. A waste of my time, my energy, my resources. Something clicked with me a few years ago. I was just done. I needed to simplify. I needed to not spend an obscene amount of time looking at fireplace mantels on Pinterest and trying to figure out how to make mine look amazing. I needed to put it all in the proper place in my heart and my mind. Which meant, it had to go waaaaayyyy down on the priority list. So far down it almost wasn’t on it. And I needed to confess to the Lord that I had allowed it to become an idol. 

Yes, I want to have a home that I enjoy. Yes, I love pretty things. But something really amazing happened when I finally released it all. When I decided to not give into the pressure and panic I would feel when I would scroll through my Instagram feed. When I just laid it all down and said…enough. There was this incredible irony in it. Because, the less time I took to decorate my home for each season, the more I found myself loving the results. I think that all along I had just been getting in my own way. It’s really taken a lot of time and prayer for me to finally be at a place where even though I still struggle with insecurities and I still have doubts from time to time, I’m becoming increasingly more confident in who God created me to be. And, just like my home, I’m finding that as I relax into myself, letting go of the comparisons and the pressure, the more I can actually lean into the calling He has placed on my life. 🍂

Leave a comment if you can relate! 

#wearethehomemakers #homemaking
“As the alluring song of September begins to whi “As the alluring song of September begins to whisper in my ear, my passionate spirit yearns for the splendor of its promise.” (Peggy Toney Horton)

Happy September dear friends! While I’m not quite ready to let go of summer and I plan to make the most out of the lingering, warm days, I’ll admit to starting to think about my fall decor this year. And one way to get inspired is to take a look back at previous years. Here’s just a glimpse at some of the ways I’ve welcomed Autumn to my home! 🍂

#september #falldecorating #falldecor #falldecoratingideas #wearethehomemakers
Labor Day weekend might mean that we’re turning Labor Day weekend might mean that we’re turning the corner and getting closer to fall but I’m not quite ready to let summer go. So I’ll just be over here continuing to whip up some super simple summer meals for my family that frankly can be enjoyed in any season. These shrimp rolls I made the other night were definitely a hit and would be great for any of your upcoming holiday weekend gatherings!

Shrimp Rolls 🍤

Ingredients
1-2 lbs of shrimp that is peeled, deveined and tail off (If using frozen make sure it’s thawed completely)
1/3 cup mayonnaise 
1/2 of a lemon
2 Tbsps chopped scallions
1 Tbsp chopped dill
1 Tbsp chopped Italian parsley
1 Tsp of Old Bay seasoning (more if you like!)
pinch of sea salt and pinch of black pepper
Hoagie Rolls
Softened butter

Directions: Gently pat the shrimp with a paper towel to remove any excess moisture. Roughly chop the shrimp and place in a bowl. Add mayonnaise, squeeze half of lemon and stir to combine before adding in the scallions, dill and parsley. Stir to combine and then add the additional seasonings. Spread butter on hoagie rolls and toast in the oven until lightly browned. Pile on the shrimp mixture and enjoy! 

#shrimproll #foodie #weeknightdinner #easydinner #seafoodlover
Today has been a very Monday-ish kind of Monday. W Today has been a very Monday-ish kind of Monday. We woke up to the sound of chainsaws and rushed downstairs to find that our backyard neighbors were having two of the huge trees that line our shared fence removed. These trees have been here longer than the neighborhood and no, they weren't dead or causing damage to roofs, foundations, etc. They were beautiful and gave us wonderful privacy. We had no notice of this happening so this came as quite a shock. Because we were given no notice, we didn't have the chance to cover our outdoor furniture or plants and everything is now coated in a thick layer of sawdust including the fresh bark we recently put in the garden beds. And now our lovely privacy is gone, replaced by a direct view of an above ground pool and RV. I know, I know, it's totally a first world, privileged kind of problem to have. But, now we have to spend thousands of dollars on plants to try and recapture some semblance of privacy. Now we have days worth of clean up to do after we had JUST done a massive freshening up of our backyard. My overarching feeling has just been weariness at the way our world is today.

I think about how often we try to do right by people, to be respectful and courteous. To be thoughtful and considerate. And it’s not reciprocated. How its starting to seem more and more like people have just given up on those seemingly small niceties. And my soul just feels heavy. Because I feel like so much of what used to be common courtesy is not so common anymore. Drivers on the roads are angrier and more reckless than ever before. Red lights being run are an everyday occurrence around town. On our recent family vacation, I heard more people using the F word out in public than ever before even while around children. Where are manners? Where is kindness? I'm finding myself being surprised when someone is thoughtful because it seems like a rarity. And that's just all on a micro, local level. Don't even get me started on the insanity in our world/culture. After I returned from grocery shopping (which can also be soul crushing), I found myself desperate for a reminder of the truth. 

*Part 2 continued in the comments.*
How often is it in our lives that we don’t fully How often is it in our lives that we don’t fully grasp our strengths or our weaknesses until we are put to the test? Little did I know how much I would love my role as a wife, mother and homemaker until I became one. And that in my endeavor to do those roles to the best of my ability, it would bring to the forefront gifts and talents and blessings that I use outside of these walls.

As I water others, I’m watered too because it brings such joy to care for those around me. But it can also make me see more clearly the areas in which I’m lacking and be a very humbling reminder of how much I still need to grow and learn.

Proverbs 11:25 says, “Whoever brings blessing will be enriched and one who waters will himself be watered.”

Have you done any ‘watering’ of others this week? How has it blessed and ‘watered’ you in return?
“Mom, this is one of my favorite meals that you “Mom, this is one of my favorite meals that you make.” Statements like this from my kids fill me with so much joy and such a sense of assurance that my role as the maker of this home is one that makes an impact on them in both big and small ways. It’s not just sheet pan shrimp boil. 

It’s nourishment
It’s time together around the table
It’s laughing as we try to get the butter sauce out of the pan
It’s a memory
It’s an imprint on their lives 

The ordinary act of making a meal becomes EXTRAordinary. And I try to keep that in mind as I do this task day in and day out, year after year. 

***

Ingredients: 
1 pound baby red or yellow potatoes
Green beans or corn (4 ears cut in half) whichever you prefer
1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 tablespoon Old Bay seasoning
1/2 tsp coarse sea salt and pinch of black pepper 
1 pound medium shrimp, peeled and deveined
1 (12.8-ounce) package smoked andouille sausage, thinly sliced
Crusty bread for dipping 

Directions:
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Lightly oil a baking sheet or coat with nonstick spray. In a large pot of boiling salted water, cook potatoes until just tender, about 10 minutes. Put potatoes, shrimp, sausage and green beans or corn on baking sheet. Pour butter over top. Sprinkle with old bay seasoning and salt and pepper. Mix well to combine. Bake for about 12 minutes or until shrimp is pink. 

#shrimpboil #sheetpandinner #sheetpanmeals #homemaking
Temperatures in the 100’s call for fresh and lig Temperatures in the 100’s call for fresh and light cocktails! My husband is my own built in bartender and he put this together the other night. 

2 jiggers of gin (you could also use vodka) 
*you should do a jig when using a jigger 😉*
Crushed ice 
Grapefruit tonic 
Squirt of lime 
Sprig of mint 

Easy and so refreshing!! ☀️

#cocktails #summercocktails
There is something magical about the late summer e There is something magical about the late summer evenings. Maybe it’s because we have a greater sense of the fact that these long days are slowly shortening and we want to savor them as much as we can. I know I intend to do just that. 

I hope you’re having a wonderful August so far dear friends!
Variations of this recipe are on repeat at our hou Variations of this recipe are on repeat at our house all summer long. We’re big on the ‘build your own’ method of making dinner especially on very hot days. Simplicity for the win! 
#recipes #easydinner #easydinnerideas #homemaking
In music, rhythm is a regular repetition or a grou In music, rhythm is a regular repetition or a grouping of beats. No matter what else a piece of music has in terms of its pitch or tone, the rhythm never changes. Its the stabilizing force and brings order to a composition that would be completely chaotic without it.

The same can be said of rhythms in our lives and in our homes. When everything else feels out of control, rhythms and patterns provide us with stability and something that we can rely upon to give us a sense of security in a very insecure world. But, too often, we associate the rhythmic things we do in our lives as merely tasks to be gotten through rather than gifts which provide much-needed balance.

Whether it’s making the coffee every night before we go to bed or doing my devotional in the morning before the rest of the house wakes up or watering my garden, these simple tasks provide a rhythm to my day that is truly grounding. 

What’s something that you do that you would classify as a rhythm or pattern in your week?
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