I often hear people talking about how they feel closest to the Lord when the sun is shining down on them. The warmth emanating from that giant star in the sky reminds them of the warmth of the love of their Heavenly Father.
And I get that. I really do.
But, for me, it’s in the coolness that I find that I sense the presence of God the most.
Every morning when I make my way downstairs, I start the coffee and then open the sliding door to our deck. And when that cool air hits my face I’m immediately refreshed, awakened. I step outside, stand still for a minute and just let it wash over me.
Right there, in that brief moment, I feel a stirring in my heart. It’s in the coolness that I feel closest to my Savior.
Lately, my soul feels kind of weary and dry. I love having my kids home in the summer. Really I do.
But now that they are a bit older and they have their own social lives and activities I feel like I’m constantly running this way and that way and all the while still trying to maintain our home, keep everyone fed and oh, you know, do that other tiny thing called running a business and write books.
During the summer season I feel like I’m never alone. And it struck me this week that what I’m craving is a little bit of heart-space.
Space to actually feel my feelings and think my thoughts.
Space where no one asks me when I’m going to the store for more food.
Space to sit for five minutes and type out a paragraph without interruption.
Space to be with my Savior and hear Him speak words of affirmation and truth over me.
Space to just…be.
The thoughts in my head seem to be swirling around, looking for a place to land. And I don’t know when I’m going to get that space. Honestly, I don’t think it’s even a realistic goal in the summertime. My expectations might just be a tad too high. Sadly, this is a common theme in my life.
And it’s leading me to wonder if perhaps the real solution isn’t exactly what I think it is.
Maybe we’re not supposed to be looking for a way to escape from all of the stuff of life in order to find that space.
Maybe it’s not that I need a vacation or to wake up EXTRA early in the morning or sign my kids up for another camp so that I can have a break from the constant requests for snacks.
Psalm 118:5-6 says this, “Pushed to the wall, I called to God; from the wide open spaces, he answered. God’s now at my side and I’m not afraid; who would dare lay a hand on me?” (msg.)
Are you longing for some heart-space and, like me, wondering where you will find it?
I can honestly say that I don’t think I’ve ever read the above passage of scripture or, if I have, I have failed to note that one particular line.
Think about it for a minute. When we are the most stressed, the most overwhelmed, the most scared, the most confused, the most ‘pushed to the wall’, He answers us from where He resides, in the wide open spaces. The spaces all around us that we can’t see or touch or understand but that we know exist because at the same exact moment that we call out for help, He is there. And, as He embodies the very essence of those wide, open spaces, we get the glorious benefit of them when feel Him at our side.
Friends, God IS the space our souls are longing for. He’s it!
Which means that, perhaps, the space can be invited into our hearts right in the middle of all of the craziness.
Perhaps what we really need to do is to simply just ask Him to meet us smack dab in the muckety-muckness of it all knowing that He brings wide open space with Him.
Perhaps it’s not thinking that we need to run away from all of life so we can get closer to Him.
It’s running TO Him while life is happening all around us and getting to experience that closeness, that space, right there in the chaos.
Perhaps it’s not wishing for hours and hours of free time that deep down we know will be nearly impossible to come by but, instead, receiving what He longs to give us in the here and now.
Perhaps the space can come in something as simple as standing out on your deck as daylight breaks, clutching your coffee cup and feeling the coolness of the morning washing over you.
Thank you for taking the time to meet me at the fence today dear friends,
I feel Him in the coolness of the morning too. Great post.
Hi Willa! Imagine my surprise when I read Vanessa’s post and scrolled down to leave a comment and saw my name…..no, I mean your name! I don’t see that very often!
Hi Willa. Sweeeet! How unique is this…as unique as our name.
Thanks for this post. I know the feeling you’re talking about – feeling a bit guilty about wishing the summer away so that my adult children will get back to school or move onto various other careers and lives. But your post was timely – and important. I’m trying to pause -between all the chaos – and pray.
Right now my home feels chaotic and is crabby. There are lists of tasks to finish and boxes to pack. We are moving our youngest to grad school. Out of state the next six years…basically everything needs to be emptied out of his room and his keepsakes packed away with the ones from his youth.
Today I witness chaos and tomorrow brings a new beginning for him and my husband and I. It’s a new chapter and a re-birth of our marriage.
I have tried to carve out some heart-time this past week as the stress has been some days overbearing. I’ve realized we have been blessed with two amazing sons and recently a daughter in law. I will say it’s days like now that I wish I was doing the “mom chase” and running to activities. But this to shall pass and I have a feeling the best is yet to come.
Thank you for your inspiring post.
Amen <3
Just keep looking up to HIM! He knows our every need!
Oh Vanessa, what an ah-ha moment! Thank you for listening to God’s bidding and sharing His word with us. God always shows me exactly what I need to read and I find it in all places. Today it was your post. My husband died unexpectedly in February of this year. I had to wait 4 long months before we traveled to Arlington National Cemetery for his burial. I just got back and I’m desperately trying to move on to the next chapter of my life….same book, new chapter. Sam and I were married for 48 years so I have really experienced loneliness since February. But perhaps I’ve failed to meet God where He is which is right here with me, all the time, each day. Thank you again for the reminder.
PS…I think it is way cool that someone else posting has the name Willa. We don’t see that very often!
Thank you so much! I really needed this verse today.
Thanks Vanessa for sharing. I agree that He is so faithful to meet us right we are.
Oh I so now the feeling, I have three grown children now and they all have children of their own, and believe it or not I miss the days when they were here at home with me!! I for one never thought they would ever grow up, but they did., some days are so trying. We have to seek the lord daily at times every ten minutes on others!! Enjoy the days your children are at home and it seems like they will never grow up, or leave you alone, they are grown for a long time and it makes for a very quite house!! But always take time for yourself it will help you appreciate the time that much more. sending hugs and prayers for a peaceful day<3
Yes!! Thanks for sharing – needed to hear this today!
Thank you for such an inspiring message of hope and closeness to the one that matters the most to us!!! We have so much to be thankful for during such difficult times. Hopefully our nation (and the world) will experience peace beyond understanding again!!!
Wow! Did I need this post! I need to “step out onto the deck.” Thanks for this.