I was at Home Goods recently (let’s not talk about the fact that I was there twice in the same week, ok?) and after perusing the aisles, valiantly trying to avoid loading up my cart with everything in the clearance section, I took my few purchases up to the front of the store and noticed that there weren’t any cashiers. I was only standing there for a few seconds before a lovely sales clerk came over to ring me up.
I recognized her as an employee with whom I had interacted a few times before (because finally having a Home Goods in our city has been a pretty exciting thing!) and we began chatting about the silverware I was purchasing and how it was going to be replacing the set that we received as a wedding gift.
We talked about our anniversaries (we’ve been married for twenty years and she and her husband were coming up on thirty years) and how we were celebrating these milestones and how many kitchen items had survived all of the years of wedded bliss. And then, as I was loading my bags into my cart, the words just came flying out of my mouth.
“I just want you to know that every time I shop here I am always so impressed by how friendly and personable you are. You exude joy and it’s obvious that you truly love what you do!”
She was so startled by my comment and her face registered the shock but this was quickly followed by a huge smile. I saw tears welling up in her eyes as she expressed her gratitude for the compliment and with the line starting to back up behind me, I gave her another smile and moved to leave the store.
After returning the cart and gathering up my bags, I headed out to my car only to realize that I, myself, was also fighting back tears. What? Why would I be the one crying? Am I just a crazy hormonal lady these days or what? Well, yes, there’s that. But also, it dawned on me that even though she was the one receiving the praise, I was the one who felt SO good about giving it.
And, I think that’s really how it’s supposed to work, isn’t it? I was the one giving the encouragement but I left having pretty much the same kind of emotions I have experienced when other people have encouraged me. The feelings we have when we give praise are so similar to the feelings we have when we receive praise that there is barely any distinction between the two.
You see, I truly believe that when we build up others we get this beautiful added bonus of experiencing joy in one of its purest forms. We start out with no expectations of getting anything in return, but what we find is that WE are the ones who are truly blessed in that moment.
So, here’s my question for you.
Who can you encourage this week?
I hope you’ll be watching for opportunities to build someone up. Because you might just be surprised by how you end up being the one who really benefits from it the most.
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Vanessa, I truly think you are one of the best people on the planet. Never stop being your wonderful amazing thoughtful sweet helpful kind loving self. EVER.
God bless you!!!! ♥♥♥
Michele you are WAY too kind!! I mess up every single day and I’m totally human but I do love encouraging others and feel that it’s one of the callings God has placed on my life. You are such a blessing to me and the way you encourage and build me up means more to me than I can possibly express. I’m so, so grateful for you! xoxo
I love this! I think that it’s a great idea to compliment others on how they do their jobs. Wonderful story!
Thank you so much Hilary!
Great story.. yes praise ea other
I love your open heart and your willingness to share your life with us. I am always encouraged by you and your openness. I too try to encourage friends and strangers whenever I can. I know it is one of my gifts. And you are right…i walk away feeling blessed. I love you. Never give up being who you are and who you were meant to be. Hugs to you.
my mom always said I never knew a stranger when I was growing up. I guess that mindset is still instilled in me since I always look for opportunities to say hello, how are you, how’s your day…etc. more than how I make others feel I know how good it makes me feel as well.
Just love this story. It just reminds me how God drops words of encouragement in our hearts for others all the time and how easy it would be for us to keep what could be a life changing exchange to ourselves out of fear of the other person’s reaction. Vanessa thank you for sharing and for being a vessel to pour joy into all of our lives! BTW super excited to get to see you speak again this year at Becoming!!!
Lovely reminder of the positive effects of a little praise or compliment. Long ago I read something about a Christian lady who practiced what you did at Home Goods. I now remember her as the button lady. She would look for something to compliment for every women she encountered while grocery shopping and once there was nothing that stood out on a cashier until she spied her buttons. so she told her how pretty her buttons were! I started putting this into practice after that and now, so many years later, I never have to look for something because my eyes just automatically go to the beautiful things in every woman I meet. And i don’t have to even think about it because I instinctively say out loud what I see. It does surprise some gals, but it no longer surprises me that I see beauty in every one of God’s dear ones.