It was a simple request.
As I turned and headed down the hallway to help his little sister with her shoes, I heard it.
Boy, it must be rough to be 8 years old these days!
He is totally RIGHT!
Sorry Mom, Dad and Heather.
If I’m throwing myself under the bus you are all coming with me!
The first place I went to was my B.I.B.L.E. (yes that’s the book for me!).
I looked up “Sighing” in the Concordance and you know what? There was only ONE verse that used that word and it had to do with sighing out of sorrow.
For some reason, I had a feeling that wasn’t exactly the kind of “sighing” I’ve been doing lately.
Well, that got me to thinking. What was I feeling when I let that little puff of air escape me?
What did it represent and what did I think I was getting away with by inhaling and exhaling in a very loud manner?
And that is when the soul searching began.
It didn’t last long, though, because it was quickly revealed to me what this whole sighing business was really all about.
It was my way of
Grumbling
Complaining
Expressing Frustration without using actual words
And, let me just tell you friends, there are A LOT of verses in the “Good Book” about those emotions!
They aren’t pretty and they sure did hit home.
“These men are grumblers and faultfinders; they follow their own evil desires; they boast about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage.” Jude 22:7
Ouch! Now I know why I don’t spend a lot of time in the book of Jude!
“Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe.” Philippians 2:14
I’m fairly certain my sighing doesn’t make me “shine like a star”.
And, I’m also fairly certain that while I may have fooled myself into thinking that it is better than actually verbally expressing my frustrations, I’m not really fooling anyone else!
I think they call it being…gulp…PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE.
Because, let’s be honest. What do I really have to sigh about?
I lead an incredibly blessed life.
I have an incredible husband who loves me, 2 amazing children and a home that not only provides shelter but is a place where I get to express my creativity. We have food, shelter, clothing and transportation times 2.
I have had my share of sorrows, that is true.
But my little day-to-day life’s issues do not warrant that kind of response.
Not when there are other things I should be sighing about.
I should sigh over the broken and hurting around the world….around my city…in my neighborhood.
I should sigh because there are children who went to bed hungry last night and will probably again tonight.
I should sigh that my children are growing up in a world that promotes living for “numero uno” more than having a servant’s heart.
These are the things that should cause me to inhale and then deeply exhale.
Maybe there was a reason that the only verse in the Bible that mentions sighing has to do with there being a day when “sorry and sighing will flee away.” Isaiah 35:10
Until that day, my desire should be to sigh for the lost…the hurt…the hungry.
And maybe, just maybe, if my children heard their mother sighing over those things, they will begin to sigh for them too.
Now, THAT is a legacy worth leaving! Don’t you think?
Thanks for joining me for this Simply Sunday at the Fence,
Don’t forget we have Inspiration Friday still going on through the weekend. Share your inspiring posts with us! And get your summer projects ready for our week long
hope you’ll join us!
Great post, Vanessa. Does the Bible have verses for eye-rolling? LOL! Hope you’re having a wonderful Sunday. xoxo Debra
So true, Vanessa! It is funny (or not) that my kids noticed I sigh everytime I hang up the phone. I never noticed. However, I really don’t think I sigh then because I am frustrated or complaining. I have no clue why I do it. I have tried to break that habit but it is hard because I don’t realize I do it! But like you I have sighed out of frustration at the store, waiting in line, or times when I think things should work a little differently. Like you, I really have no reason to sigh. We have hit a rough patch here lately but it isn’t anything that affects the health and welfare of my husband and kids so I need to start being thankful in those situations instead of sighing over trivial things!
Great post for me before we head to church this morning!
I just want to be honest about my response to this post. Usually when I visit a new blog and the first thing I read are bible quotes, I quickly click away. Not because I’m *anti* Christian, I’m just not a big church and bible type person.
This post was very different for me though! You expressed the kinds of sentiments that I wish to see in churches around me. The kind of churches that are honest about their faults and work to change themselves and their communities for the better. If I found a church that embodied the kinds of feelings and priorities that I took from your post today, no matter the denomination, I would start attending regularly.
Thank you so much for this pick me up this morning. I’m a loyal reader now for sure!
Amen!
And you know…It’s just one big bad terrible habit! I have to pray about this daily and have failed multiple times. But, I keep plugging away at sighing, or anything else that comes from me in the form of exasperation!
Thankfully, we have a Book that tells us exactly what and how we should be responding. And I for one, want to be a shining example to my little and big people.
Great post!
Love, Kristin
So true, thank you for pointing it out. I get upset at my kids all the time for complaining about the little things, but of course they learn it from me. A reminder to appreciate and be thankful for what we have is welcomed. I cant wait to show this to my kids….good topic for Sunday!
Stacy
Thanks for posting this. I, too, come from a long line of “sigh-ers,” and my children called me on it a while back. You are exactly right about it being a passive aggressive form of complaining and grumbling. Now that school is out for the summer, I need the reminder!
I love these Sunday posts, Vanessa. You’re so honest and open and lovely – and I’m sure that’s a WONDERFUL legacy to be passed down your family. And you always look for things that you can improve in yourself, and that’s an amzing legacy too!!
Nope, you haven’t managed to pull yourself off your ‘amazing mummy’ pedastal – not by a long shot!!
Sarahx
SIGH- I am sighing because that was such a sweet and true message. Our little SCheeks is a sigher too…sometimes followed by an UhgggGH~ It is funny what we do, isn’t it, that impacts those all around us. I think sometimes we don’t even know we are doing it.
One of the guys I work with said to me the other day. Okay-short sigh- then looked at me to see if I “got it”. What? I asked. Okay- short sigh. What? I asked again. He said- I wish I had a quarter (remember when it used to be a penny) for every time you said (repeat-Okay-short sigh). I asked- Do I do that? Everytime you come out of that office to fix something-when you are done..was his answer. Well, how funny is that? I started monitoring myself and I do it ALL the time. OKAY is my go-to word -rather than HOT Damn I guess! lol So, I have trying to not say that anymore..but now I am wondering what I am replacing it with. Sorry for the swear word on your blog-I don’t know what to replace it with that would get the meaning across about my Okay-short sigh!;>)
Have a wonderful Sunday- GREAT post- okay-sigh- bye-xo Diana
You have a beautiful family, Vanessa. You are so lovely, your kids are so cute and your hubby’s a handsome fella!…Christine
very good, timely post.
🙂
my husband is always reminding me to ‘breathe’ as if i would forget. too often it comes out as a sigh.
wondering WHY i do that now, as it isn’t usually a thing of discontentment…maybe the passive-aggressive diagnosis is right on the nose.
OUCH!
thanks for the, uhm, encouragement! blessed sunday!
Wow, this one hits home! I too sigh too much, too often! Thanks for sharing!!
Blessings!!
Vanessa, this is a wonderful post! So convicting. . . I’m afraid I’m guilty of sighing a lot, too. I’m glad you wrote this–I need to realize what I’m actually communicating and think about what I WANT to communicate instead. Thank you for inspiring me!
I’m crying…this hit close to home for my husband and myself. Thank you for sharing this with us today. It’s amazing how our God works through each of us and tonight he found our troubled hearts through you.
Heather
Oh, what a great post. You have convicted me. Your brother-in-law would give my family the two thumbs down for our legacy of sighing, too.
I’ll go ahead and admit that ours is always preceded with the tch, too.
tch, ughhhhhhhhh…
OUCH! I am with Debra…is there a verse for eye-rolling?! Oh, I sigh, roll my eyes, cross my arms, pout, etc…mostly at my dear husband! I guess our kids are like mirrors because the first time I saw my daughter roll her eyes at him, I knew exactly where she got it! It made me realize that my attitude and behavior towards Rob is so important! This was very good! I always laugh when you write! Sleep well friend!
OH Vanessa, this really hit home for me. I sigh a lot but I have myself convinced it’s ok to sigh because I’m not actually “saying” anything. Thanks for setting me straight!!
I’d never though about this before, but I’m afraid I know EXACTLY what you mean about sighing. You’re so right; it’s NOT a good legacy to leave. Fortunately, I don’t think either of my daughters have followed my occasionally poor example, but I’ll be watching myself more closely from now on. Thanks, Vanessa, for your beautifully transparent post.
Such a great post Vanessa~ really makes you think. Thanks for sharing this!
This sounds like a lot of fun! I’d love to join in. Is there a breakdown of what to link up on what day? {or, which blog is hosting what type of project?}