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At The Picket Fence with Vanessa Hunt

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February 8, 2018

When You Need to Hibernate

I’ve been a little bit more quiet here lately. And I’ve wanted to share with you what’s been happening but I just couldn’t quite get it written down. So I’m coming to you in a video instead.

It’s a little bit messy and a little bit raw and a LOT honest. And, frankly, it would be much easier for me to not share this with you but I think there might be someone out there who needs to know they aren’t the only one who finds themselves in a quieter season.

Just a heads up. this was originally done in a FB live video so you might hear me responding a bit to some of the comments.

 

Have you been or are you currently in a season of needing to hibernate for a bit?

Please know, dear friends, that I understand. That I will sit in it with you. And that it’s ok.

Because community is best done when we can support each other in every season, don’t you think?

Thank you so much for meeting me at the fence today,

P.S. I want to reiterate that I am not battling depression (and I promise I’m not in denial). I know the symptoms and have walked alongside friends and family as they have struggled with it. I also have many people who would encourage me to get help if they saw any evidence of it in my life. There is a HUGE difference between needing to be quiet/hibernate for a bit and being truly depressed.  And if you are wondering if perhaps you are struggling with depression, please reach out to someone. You could even reach out to me and I would be honored to help point you towards some resources. xoxo

14 Comments Filed Under: Faith

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Comments

  1. Lynn Mosher says

    February 8, 2018 at 4:05 PM

    Sounds like you had too much on your plate at once and you wore yourself out. Don’t ever feel guilty for taking care of yourself. You needed to retreat and rest your soul. To refuel. To refresh. You may still need some retreat time. Please take care of that inner part of you. May the Lord bless you. ❤

    Reply
  2. Karen K. says

    February 8, 2018 at 5:11 PM

    I think you’ve had too much at one time & you need to chill for awhile. That’s perfectly all right!! You have to take care of yourself, so grab a pillow & blanket & relax on the couch. Prayer helps also!!

    Reply
  3. Naomi S. says

    February 8, 2018 at 6:00 PM

    I have always tho’t that Winter should be declared “hibernation time”! Especially if you live in a cold climate. If we could just allow ourselves to stay inside and be as unproductive as we felt like. For the whole season! I, myself, and a couple of my friends, border on the description of hermits. We all understand that we may not hear from the others for months, sometimes. It doesn’t mean we are mad or that we don’t want to be friends anymore, it just means that we don’t have energy for “relating” right now.

    Anyway, I think it’s quite alright for you to draw back for as long as you need to. I truly understand that need. It means we are taking time for ourselves to refuel. And we should feel alright with doing it.

    Reply
  4. Mary-Ann (from Canada!) says

    February 8, 2018 at 6:39 PM

    Vanessa, I just want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. You have been such a busy gal and, sometimes, you just feel like you need time to just sit and take a break! This is so important. There is nothing wrong with taking some time for you and you don’t have to feel guilty about this. It’s always good when you realize that you need to step away from being so busy. The Lord knows all about what you are going through and He loves and cares for you. Just keep looking up to Him! Your friends are lifting you up to Him in prayer. The sun will shine brightly for you again soon! May you feel God’s presence in a very special way in the coming week. Don’t ever forget how special you are in God’s eyes — and in the eyes of all your friends who read your posts Bless you, dear friend.

    Reply
  5. Diane says

    February 8, 2018 at 7:30 PM

    My mother always called it quiet time. I arranged for my children to have quiet time also when they were kids. And now my daughter does it for her kids. I see nothing wrong with quiet time or hibernation or whatever you want to call it.

    Reply
  6. Michele says

    February 8, 2018 at 10:36 PM

    It’s completely understandable with all you’ve been up to lately.

    Heavens to Betsy – take time for yourself and worry not.

    We look forward to knowing you’re happy, healthy, rested and ready for spring – it’s around the corner. God bless. Hugs and prayers. ♥

    Reply
  7. Wilma Prohaska says

    February 8, 2018 at 11:41 PM

    Oh dear. You were just overwhelmed with work and the flu didn’t do you any favor by showing up during such a busy time in life. I would cry too.
    It is ok to decide to settle and retire ; just for a few days or weeks as much as you need; in the company and quiet comfort of God.
    You will be better. You opened your heart and ears to a sunny day. Hugs.

    Reply
  8. Wanda says

    February 8, 2018 at 11:50 PM

    Vanessa, take your time. Rest, rejuvenate, revitalize. We will still be here when your winter turns to spring. SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) may be a contributing factor in your “darkness”.

    Reply
  9. Debbie says

    February 9, 2018 at 6:19 AM

    Thank you Vanessa for being so open and honest with us. Listening to your video I just wanted to give you a hug. Sometimes when I read other blogs they look like they have a perfect life and everything going for them. I know we all have trials and struggles in life and times where we just need to be alone. Thankfully God is always there with us through our struggles and never leaves us. Your followers will be there for you when you are ready. Please rest and take the time you need. I know I will still be here. Sending my hug

    Reply
  10. Sarah Braden says

    February 9, 2018 at 9:12 AM

    I resonate with so much of what you said. Thank you for being courageous and sharing your heart with us.

    Reply
  11. Norma Rolader says

    February 10, 2018 at 7:49 AM

    God bless you for sharing and prayers for you! I is perfectly alright to chill and take time out! I am so glad you shared your story I have been fighting severe depression, panic attacks and anxiety attacks for the last few years and seeing a doctor … I was not able to leave my home my husband had to do all … now all the progress that I have made I am following back due to now my husband is in in-home hospice and all has been put on me to do and for the last he has taken a turn for the worse we have my 81 yr old mother living with us Please keep us in your prayers as I will be praying for you

    Reply
  12. Kerna Pettorelli says

    February 12, 2018 at 2:47 AM

    I admire your courage to speak your truth.
    Blessings to you. XO

    Reply
  13. Cindy says

    February 16, 2018 at 3:26 PM

    You are an amazing woman. I am giving you a big hug and I love you and I totally understand. I have been there. Thanks for sharing what is on your heart. I have never personally met you but I feel I know you and it will all be okay. Just a season of life. Praying for you with lots of love.

    Reply
    • At The Picket Fence says

      February 16, 2018 at 5:03 PM

      Oh thank you so much Cindy! I’d take a hug! LOL! It’s so nice to know that we aren’t alone in these seasons isn’t it? I really do feel like I’m beginning to come out of it and the support of this amazing community has been so incredible. Blessings to you! xoxo

      Reply

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The first weekend in December seems like a good ti The first weekend in December seems like a good time for my annual gentle reminder about this month. I don’t know about you but, for me, December is a month of mixed emotions, ranging from joy-filled moments to ones that have me wanting to pull my hair out.

There are so many expectations and we put so much pressure on ourselves to create magical memories. And for years I have felt the added weight of wanting to make sure my family had opportunities throughout the month to grow in their relationship with Christ.

We celebrate advent and read all of the appropriate Baby Jesus books and encourage a spirit of generosity and heavily emphasize the real reason for the season.

But sweet friends, I want to remind you today that one month out of the year does not a strong relationship with the Lord make. December doesn’t define our faith in Christ.

For our families or for us.

There are 11 other months in the year. 11 other months to live out our faith in front of our children. 11 other months to pray with them. 11 other months to help them wrestle through their questions and add depth to their walk with the Lord. 11 other months to encourage them to have generous spirits.

Let’s stop putting so much pressure on this one month out of the year. Let’s be surprised at the ways we might be able to celebrate the baby in the manger without a dozen countdown calendars. Let’s give our kids some grace when they are focused more on gifts because…well…they’re kids after all.

And while we’re at it, let’s give ourselves some grace too.

Grace when we think we should feel all the warm fuzzy feelings about Christmas but we really just want to take a nap. Or have a good cry. 

Grace that reminds us that this month will soon be over and we will have a brand new year ahead of us.

A new year filled with big moments and little moments and everything in between.

A new year to draw even closer to our Savior.

My hope for you is that, as you head into this season, you will be given fresh perspective and that you will give yourself (and your family) permission to just ‘be’. ✨
✨ The first Sunday of Advent is upon us and this ✨ The first Sunday of Advent is upon us and this year I created a super simple centerpiece for my dining room that incorporates the candles we will use each of the four weeks leading up to Christmas. While we will only light one candle each week, I used more than four so that the centerpiece would look a bit more filled in. In keeping with my goal to embrace a softer approach to my decorating, this arrangement works perfectly and helps to keep our focus on the beauty and the meaning  of the Advent season. For more ideas like this, check out my previous Advent post! ✨

#advent #adventcandles #simplechristmas #wearethehomemakers
In this season of motherhood, my soul is feeling a In this season of motherhood, my soul is feeling a bit more tender. When Christmas rolls around and I no longer have wish lists that include Lego sets or dollhouses, I find that I want my home to reflect this craving for all things gentle.

So our hot cocoa station this year is much more simple and done in a neutral color palette that just subtly blends in with the rest of the decor. It still feels festive and is definitely still “user friendly” but it’s just a bit less…well…less.

And, that’s ok. It’s not that this area won’t ever again have bright colors (maybe even pops of red!) but, right now I’m happy to have things this way.

With all that is going on in the world right outside our door, my desire is for our home to truly feel like a respite. I want it to be where we come and let our guard down, our heart rates slow and to be flooded with a sense of peace in knowing that here is where we can just simply be. I want it to be a place of rest. Rest from the constant onslaught of news and information. Rest from the seemingly small struggles of school and jobs that can so often feel like big struggles.

And, most importantly, we rest in the comfort of knowing the One who is Sovereign over all and is the reason this month is so very special and sacred.

Many blessings to you dear friends as we kick off this wonderful season! ✨
Next week is first Sunday of Advent. And contrary Next week is first Sunday of Advent. And contrary to popular belief, the celebration of Advent is VERY different from just simply doing a ‘countdown to Christmas’. It’s not about having little drawers filled with candy or doors to open with prizes inside. Those things are so much fun and definitely help to build anticipation as you head closer and closer to the big day.

But Advent, from the latin word ‘adventus’ meaning ‘arrival’ or ‘appearance’ keeps the focus completely on celebrating the arrival of the King who came in the form of an infant.

This is one of our favorite family traditions and over the years I’ve figured out how to incorporate the Advent candles into my decor without using the traditional wreath. I hope this gives you some ideas and inspiration as we head into this sacred season. 🌲

#advent #adventdecoration #wearethehomemakers
Why do I start decorating before Thanksgiving? Bec Why do I start decorating before Thanksgiving? Because it’s the Saturday after and my house is almost completely ready to start the season! So I’m sitting with my coffee and just soaking it all up knowing that now I can focus on shopping, hosting and preparing our hearts for the start of Advent. The only thing left to do is get our fresh tree for the front room and then the decorating is done. 

Starting early is a gift I give to myself and I’m always grateful for it! 🌲

#simplechristmas #traditionalchristmas
“I would maintain that thanks are the highest fo “I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” ~ G.K. Chesterton

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours dear friends! 🍂
Christmas has arrived in the family room where I k Christmas has arrived in the family room where I keep things simple but festive! We’ll get a fresh tree after Thanksgiving which will go in our front room bay window but this slim faux tree with its colorful ornaments tides us over for now. Which room in your home gets the Christmas treatment first? Or do you just start doing a little at a time in each room? 🎄

*pillow covers are from @jshhomeessentials
I share this recipe every year because it’s JUST I share this recipe every year because it’s JUST.THAT.GOOD! 

And I have a confession ...I’d rather have cranberry sauce smothering the turkey on my plate than gravy any day!! And this, this right here? Well it’s the best (and easiest!) cranberry sauce ever!! I eat on crackers and sandwiches and sometimes just by the spoonful. It’s so yummy! And I’m just so very thankful for all of you that I’m going to leave the recipe right here instead of making you go to the blog to get it. I promise you won’t regret having this on your Thanksgiving menu but be warned...you may find yourself up in the middle of the night sneaking some helpings of this deliciousness. Or maybe that’s just me!

Ingredients:
2 pounds fresh or frozen cranberries
2 oranges
2 cups granulated sugar
1 cup white wine.

Instructions:
Wash and pick over berries, removing any that are soft. Peel and dice oranges removing any seeds. Combine all ingredients in a large pot. Bring to a full boil. Reduce heat and continue cooking until cranberries pop open and mixture is thickening.
For best flavor, prepare and let stand for several days before using.

Gobble, gobble!! 🦃
How do I want people to feel when they walk throug How do I want people to feel when they walk through my front door? That’s always at the top of my mind when I’m decorating my entry for each season, particularly at Christmastime. 

✨I want them to feel like my home is greeting them with a smile.

✨I want them to feel like this is a place where care has been given to details (but not to the point of being too stuffy or too busy or too overwhelming). 

✨I want them to feel like there is peace here.

✨I want them to feel like they are welcome…because they are. 

My home is a reflection of my heart and my heart is a reflection of the ONE for whom I live and try to honor and praise all of my days, but especially at Christmas.

How do you want people to feel when they come into your home? 

#christmasentry #simplechristmas #simplicity #wearethehomemakers
This is not a criticism of those who are sharing t This is not a criticism of those who are sharing their great new Christmas finds but rather an encouragement to those of you who are feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all and trying to resist the temptation to purchase more items than you really need.

Several years ago I felt a conviction in my heart about how much time and money I was spending on trying to create a new look every Christmas. I was not being a good steward of my resources and I was far too easily swayed by the peer pressure in this area. And a funny thing happened when I smashed this idol that had taken up residence in my heart. I suddenly found renewed joy in decorating for the season. By keeping things simple and maybe only buying something like a new spool of velvet ribbon, I actually realized that I could be far more creative reusing and repurposing what I already had.

In the coming weeks your news feeds will be filled with temptations for MORE. Maybe, this year, you too can find the joy in LESS. 🌲

#simplechristmas #simplicity #wearethehomemakers
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